The frozen tundra does not wait

It is freezing here in Minnesota, but the stores are not reflecting this harsh reality. Online and at the mall, the outerwear is still very much stuck in fall. Makes sense, since winter doesn't officially start until somewhere in December, but nobody told that to the arctic cold fronts swooping down from the far north. I need a new warm coat, but am not finding exactly what I want. So I am waiting. Watching. Stalking my prey, like a cat. Like one of those hairless Dr. Evil looking cats, because IT'S ONLY OCTOBER AND I AM FREEZING!

Ahem. I am finding some beautiful jackets and coats in the meantime. Unfortunately, I can't afford to buy them. I can still look at them though, and share them with you. Jackets and coats...what's the difference between a jacket and a coat? They seem to overlap, and I think this is just a scam they use online to get you to look at more jackets and coats. There's no difference that I can see. 

The oracle (aka Google) tells me that a jacket is a short coat usually extending to the hips. A coat is a sleeved outer garment extending from the shoulders to the waist or below. Wait a minute. So a coat could be a jacket too if it's not long? Now I think the poor definition of either garment just gives stores a perfect opportunity to confuse us into buying more outerwear!

Now that I've established that conspiracy theory, lets move on to the coat and jacket porn:

This cardigan sweater jacket/coat thingy has those awesome sleeves that I love. The thinner arms are longer though, so rather than gigot I think these are called Juliette sleeves. Sounds fancy, huh? You can learn all about sleeves here at Wikipedia. This faux-fur trimmed cardigan has a great belt to make your waist look thin, a lovely gray color that will make you look sophisticated, and a faux-fur collar that will make you look like a movie star (or an animal killer - you can actually buy a faux not fur lapel pin so people will know you're not!). It's from Juicy Couture and retails for $280.

How cute is this? Military double-breasted coat with purple lining and cuffs. 90% Virgin Wool, 10% cashmere. Lining 60% acetate, 40% viscose.  Sonia by Sonia Rykiel, retails for $755.

I love almost all of the outerwear at Modcloth. Here are some favorites:

West End Girls Coat (great, now I have that Pet Shop Boys song in my head!). So cute, $217.99. If only an East End Boy came with it.

Anna Von Diederitz coat, faux fur collar, $83.99. It is also available in white. One thing that bothers me about Modcloth is that they usually don't list the type of fabrics used. Is it wool? Cotton? Polyester? Who knows. It's adorable though. I've never actually purchased from Modcloth, but I'm sure they'd be happy to give those details upon request. I just prefer those details up front, ya know? It's important to me what something is made of, especially when it comes to outerwear. Moving on...

Five Alarm Coat, $64.99.  I love, love, love red coats. I says look at me, I'm the life of the party, the heartbeat of this cold gray day! It says I'm not dead! I'm representing humanity, the heart of cold suburbia! I watch way too many movies with representative color, which have now has become a cliche, thanks a lot M. Night Shyamalan!

Yellow has that effect too. Modcloth knows it, they call this the When Life Gives You Lemons coat. $129.99. It has a satin lining, it looks soft, could be wool, could be cotton, who knows? Grr. It's by BB Dakota.

One more from Modcloth:

This Madison Jacket is so classic and classy. Love the belt, the single breasted simplicity, the seaming. Orchid purple satin lining, made by Tulle, $107.99.

I love gray and I love yellow, but I have not loved them together...until now.

Valentino Roma full-length jacket from Yoox. Satin, two pockets, snap close, lined interior. $790. If this were styled badly, it could go into bathrobe territory really quick.

Stella McCartney Tufted Wool Coat, $8,845. It does have a rather Muppet like appearance, but it must feel fabulous to wear. It's tufted wool and silk - mostly wool, it's only 5% silk (that's not including the lining). It looks like the wool was looped into the base fabric of the coat shaped, and then either felted with a washing machine or with a carder. I crochet and have knitted (I don't like knitting, too difficult). I'm curious if I could make a scarf or hat like this? Hm. Anyway, pretty pricy, but it is coat porn! It does look like it was a lot of work to make. Not THAT much, but...

Here's something you can maybe afford - Takeout Sherpa-Lined Hooded Sweater Coat from Kohl's, on sale for $27.99.  If you order today, shipping is only 99 cents per item! This sweater coat comes in 5 different colors. I just noticed this is Juniors size. If you're like me, you can squeeze into the larger sizes. although this looks like it might be a little narrow for my knockers. There are a lot of cute cardigan sweaters on sale now at Kohl's in Women's sizes.

This coat from Kohl's is close to what I had in mind to get for winter. Croft and Barrow Hooded Wool Coat, on sale for $108.00, women's sizes S-XL. Kohl's has other nice women's coats and cute plus-sized coats too.

Effortless Velvet Coat from Boden, $218. Comes in 6 colors, but she wore blue velvet, bluer than velvet was the niiiight....